I have a dilemma, and it’s a conflict between my children’s safety and my wallet. I know you’re thinking that my children should always win out. But stay with me here. My husband, who I love dearly, is out of town. (Now, I won’t mention that he is out of town having fun for his 40th birthday while I slave away with the children, because that would be indicating that I am slightly bitter about the situation, which, of course, being an angel of a wife, I am not.) But, he is out of town, whooping it up, while I slave away, and I have a meeting that I need to go to and no one here to watch the children.
I also have two wonderfully competent and capable sitters whom I can call, but they both cost $20/hr (ouch!). While I love and adore my children, and want them to be safe and protected at all costs. But protecting them to the tune of $20/hr so I can go plan a golf tournament seems a bit steep, no? My children, ages 6 and 8, are at that age where they shower by themselves, get themselves dressed, and pretty much put themselves to bed. So the sitter merely needs to make sure they don’t kill each other or burn the house down. So why pay $20/hour?
I start looking into some of the local middle school children and decide that maybe this is the way to go. I ask around and get some amazing references. But I’m still uncomfortable. I start letting my mind wander. What if there is an earthquake. Will a middle schooler know what to do? Will they be able to stay calm and take care of my children while the walls are shaking and all the dishes are breaking and the house is going up in flames from the broken gas lines? What if there is a sudden flash flood? Will they be able to handle that? What about a giant, rabid grizzly bear? What if a 747 crashes into the house?
I know what you are thinking. You’re a nut. A crazy loon. Certifiable. Run straight to the nearest shrink’s office and get myself on some medication, because I am clearly a little high strung. But I’m not really, you see. I am a normal person. I just have this thing when it comes to my kids. I have this nagging worry in the back of my head about the unexpected. Although I think these things, I am able to overcome them, and decide that they are irrational, and that while a huge UFO could in fact hover over my house, it is highly unlikely to happen. So, I pick a responsible 13 year old to sit for me at the reasonable rate of $8/hr and check in when I feel my pulse quicken and the panic attack start.
Maybe it isn’t a conflict between their safety and my wallet after all. Maybe the conflict is just all in my head.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I have these debates ALL the time too, weighing the cost of a more expensive sitter with the likelihood of disaster. You are very sane. Well, assuming I am.
I hear you Cammi, and I don’t think any of us are insane (at least I hope not!) My rule is the further away I am, the more I pay, therefore I will pay $18/hour for a mature college student to babysit when I cross the bridge into SF, but $8 for a very capable high schooler to sit if I’m nearby (especially if the kids are asleep, much less likelihood of ER/ wild hyena visits,etc.) However, I am trying to say “no” to volunteer jobs/meetings that require hiring a babysitter… (unless of course, I desperately need to escape.)
I have tp agree with Michelle. If we are going over the bridge into the city, I definitely hire the more expensive sitter. But if we are staying around Marin, we always try to get the teenagers. You are close by and we all have cell phones. If there is a problem, they can easily contact us.
When my kids are your kids ages…I’ll hire a teenager too if I have to go to a meeting down the street. We were all raised with teenage babysitters in the 70’s and look how well-adjusted we all turned out!
Cammi – what a great article. We recently went down on the pay scale for a couple dates, and although the initial idea of paying $10/hour was great, in the end I realized it wasn’t worth it; unless, like Michelle suggested, we’re just down the way. Thanks for putting the perfect words to what I’ve been thinking about lately!
Cammi,
Can I get the name of that middle school sitter, now that you have tested them out for me
Great article. I am excited to read the rest of them.
Cammi-
I am with you, I know for sure that a UFO is gonna come circle my house until we leave then nab Kylie. This is why I actually should be on medication (as a therapist I have easy access) So.. the alternative- I only leave her with 3 people- you being one of them:)
Thanks for all of these awesome blogs. Love that we all can talk openly about our struggles as parents. Finally!